Off the beaten track

I KNEW there were places on Earth where technology was completely absent and the mobile phone we all take for granted was an alien device, unfathomable to the human mind that you could hear the voice of another person in a totally different location coming out of the receiver, right into your ear.

Now, I knew such places existed of course, completely untouched by the modern world and the pushy materialistic values of city life, but it was such a novel experience to visit such a place myself.

About five years ago, I hiked with a Frenchman and super-adventurous friend from Hong Kong into a remote stone village near Dali, China.

The first thing that struck me was how beautiful this village was, situated at the foothills of the Himalayas, seemingly perched on the edge of the world with a panoramic view money couldn’t buy.

Off the beaten track: Jojo with some children from the remote village where no one lived with a mobile phone.
Children ran squealing and giggling through cobbled corridors ironically dressed in Western-looking sweaters though they had never seen a television set in their lives.

I stumbled into an old man’s home, not realising I was in his ‘living room’ as the entire village had no doors.

I apologetically shuffled out of his house mumbling, “So sorry to disturb you…” but he just stared open-mouthed, over his pipe, making me feel like my unexpected visit was as foreign and exciting as a UFO descending upon his village.

I then walked into a school and curiously poked my face into a classroom.

The teacher did not see me but the children did. As I was leaving the compound, the entire class scrambled out into the open courtyard to simply stare at all of us, until the teacher chased them back into the classroom.

The truth is that I was as fascinated by them as they were about us.

For instance, I presumed no one knew the exact time of day it was because no one wore a wristwatch. By contrast, I can’t even count the number of times in a day I’m checking what time it is.

As I meandered through this charming village on foot, it occurred to me that families had to basically trust each other because their homes had no doors.

I guess there was nothing of great value to steal but nevertheless, it would be unthinkable for us city dwellers to live without a lock or reliable alarm system, let alone no door at all. Most of us were brought up not to trust any strangers yet in this village, we were invited to join the head monk for tea.

This quiet and well-respected monk ruled firmly and peacefully over the entire village.

With just a few friendly nods and even fewer words spoken, made for one of the most therapeutic afternoons I’ve ever spent doing such a simple task.

Life was lived at such a leisurely pace in this village and as I absorbed the incredible view of the mountains all around me, the saying, “Stop and smell the roses” came to mind because life can pass us by when we live it at a frantic pace.

This is something I’m definitely guilty of when I’m running late for a shoot with my Twitter alerts going off and my heart hammering in my chest in panic because I’m stuck in one of KL’s insane bumper-to-bumper traffic jams.

It was a real eye-opener visiting this village because it’s not every day you see people living life in such a simple fashion where having a solid roof over your head with rice in your food bowl meant you had enough to live.

They did not compete for the latest gadget or crave for the new iPhone 4s because they were unaware of its existence and seemed perfectly content with their lives.

Though the thought of this humble village undergoing such drastic change makes me wince, I realise that change is inevitable. Information in this day and age is like an unstoppable force, which must be shared, not suppressed, bringing practically every ‘village’ on Earth together through the amazing invention of today’s World Wide Web.

However, I can only hope that the innocent children I met whose eyes lit up in wonder at the smallest things wouldn’t become hardened and jaded by the urban world obsessed by what it must have because it strives to be set apart from the group of “have-nots.”

Reality TV still raking in audiences

MANY of us have a love-hate relationship with reality TV shows. We love to hate them and we hate to love them but the bottom line is, we are still watching them.

When the Big Brother series came to an end in 2010 after being on UK’s Channel 4 for a decade, people thought it would signify the death of the genre, but it did quite the opposite.

A plethora of other reality formats started sprouting up round the globe.

American Idol exploded on the scene in 2002 with 9.9 million viewers, which skyrocketed to almost 27 million in Season 4, making it the most watched reality series in America for six straight seasons. In the UK, reality “fever” shows no signs of abating. In fact, the viewership has grown even larger.

The opening episode of last year’s X Factor attracted a record of about 11 million viewers (which comprises almost half the entire viewing audience).

The Apprentice pulled in eight million strong viewers and the finale alone of Britain’s Got Talent reeled in a staggering audience of more than 14 million viewers.

According to the Observer, the combined viewership of all these reality shows, added up to about 41 million, which outstripped the 27 million people who voted in UK’s last general election.

So what is the attraction of reality TV? People can’t put their finger on the precise reason behind this phenomenon. There are a myriad of theories to explain why it seems to work though.

Reality TV helps people escape the conundrum of their own daily lives. Whether or not we choose to admit it, we humans are somehow fascinated watching real people we can relate to, rather than actors with a script, struggling to reach their “goals”.

We empathise with them, root for them and identify with their problems like a soap opera unfolding in real-time.
In fact, we get so involved that we even feel compelled to actively participate in their ultimate fate. Die-hard fans cannot bear to passively stand by and watch their favourite contestants being sent off so they try to “save” them with their votes.

In a world dominated by Facebook and Twitter, where decisions are made with a click of a few buttons on who to follow, who to “like” or become friends with, this type of interactivity and involvement from audiences are common amongst the new Social Media generation.

When I first found out that my production house, kyanite.tv was going to be producing Miss Malaysia Universe 2012. Beauty Camp, I was naturally excited because it was the first time this pageant has been turned into a reality format.

On the other hand, I was also worried as a producer whether Malay-sian contestants would actually bare their souls, so to speak and share their real emotions with us. I was curious as to whether the same ingredients, which make reality TV a success overseas, would apply here in Malaysia.

Well, we have already shot five episodes of the series, and as it turns out, there are some things, which are clearly universal.

You cannot possibly put a bunch of women together in a bungalow, wake them up at the crack of dawn to endure physical, mental and emotional challenges and NOT have real drama. Add in national director of Miss Universe Malaysia and the show’s host, Andrea Fonseka and you have a recipe for even more drama and brutal honesty on your hands.

Fonseka is tough as nails as a host and does not sit on the fence as a judge. If she thinks a contestant performed terribly in a challenge, then that’s what she’ll be telling her and why. On the panel of judges, actor/producer, Hans Isaac, does not hold back his opinions either. When he was judging a particular photo challenge where two contestants had to pose with an exotic bird for a fashion shoot, he bluntly commented, “I’m sorry girls but the winner in this shot is the bird!”

We’ve seen some real stories, and real tears being shed with beautiful characters as well as manipulative ones being pitted against each other in Beauty Camp.

As the show’s director, Michael Lim of Kyanite.tv says, “It’s been intense. For the girls. For the crew. For the audience. It’s been 30 days of living out of each other’s pockets where there was as much drama behind the scenes as there was on camera.”

In last week’s episode, I was personally touched by the strength of character demonstrated by a contestant called Deviyah who suddenly got eliminated but exercised her ‘wild card’ decision to at least save her fellow contestant, Suchitra from the same fate. She was already out herself, yet still able to think of someone other than herself, at her weakest moment.

It’s these real-life twists and turns, which make reality TV so addictive. I’ve experienced a whole range of emotions myself from observing the girls and how they deal with situations that get thrown at them.

The Favourite Child Syndrome

I was the last sibling in my family, born almost 10 years after my sisters. To this day, I’m sometimes still referred to as “the child” because my older sisters used to help change my diapers.

Some people assumed I was the favourite child because I was the “baby” of the family.

I asked my mother when I turned six years old, “Am I your favourite?” and she set me straight from that day onwards.

Mother said sternly, “Every child of mine is special. There are no favourites. When we are gone, Mum and Dad need all of you to stick together and look out for each other. Don’t ever forget that.”

Whatever we learn from such a young, impressionable age gets carried forward as a modus operandi, embedded into our blueprint for survival. It was unspoken between my sisters and I that we had to be there for each other, no matter how much we squabbled.

When I was 14 years old, my middle sister used to drive me to my National Track and Field races and she was the one cheering harder than anyone in the stands when I won my first gold medal.

At the time, I was too young to realise how fortunate I was to have such a supportive big sister.

Even my eldest sister was no different. She would wake up at 5am, if need be, just to pick me from the airport (even if you told her not to trouble herself).

Despite the fact all three of us lead different lives and are based in different countries now, I still feel supported across the miles.

The fact they bother to read my articles online is a sign they care about what is going on in my life, and I don’t take it for granted.

I realise that the way we are perceived and treated by our own family members ends up permeating every aspect of our lives.

If you were unloved, bullied or discriminated against in your household, you could grow up thinking the world is a difficult place to find acceptance or be appreciated.

I had a friend who could never make her parents proud, no matter how hard she tried.

It was really painful to see her put so much effort into gaining their approval but they never seemed to notice or acknowledge her accomplishments. They were usually too busy fussing over her younger brother (their only son).

Years ago, when she found out her mother loved the piano, she decided to take piano lessons to impress her but this backfired when her brother started learning the piano as well. Within months, he overtook his sister and skipped a grade.

Her mother said, “Just look at your brother. He’s so much faster than you. I’ve decided to cancel your lessons because you’re wasting our money.”

Needless to say, she developed an inferiority complex over time. She became a model (which is how I met her) but her parents wanted her to become a doctor or lawyer.

The pressure of never matching up to their expectations started to take a toll on her. She never felt “good enough.”

She was always compared to her brother and she felt very ‘unattractive’, despite the fact she was posing for top fashion magazines around the region.

All these insecurities started at home. They always do. Favouritism of siblings from an early age can cause long-term repercussions on an individual’s self-esteem and sense of belonging in their working life or relationships with other people.

I know it’s easier said than done. We’re all human and everyone seems to have a favourite football team they passionately follow, or favourite food, or boss’s favourite employee who everyone loves to hate at the office but when parents dote on their ‘favourite’ child, it can have a lasting impact on everyone around them.

Favoured siblings may grow up feeling a sense of entitlement and those least favoured may suffer from feelings of inadequacy or self-worth issues.

Psychologist and author of the Connected Father, Dr Carl Pickhardt, said that children are very keenly aware of the slightest variations in their parents’ treatment of them or their siblings.

The moment these discrepancies are felt, that’s when parents hear the all too familiar, “It’s so unfair!” cry from their children.

“Every parent may have a favourite, or a preference. It is absolutely normal,” says psychologist Ellen Weber, author of The Favourite Child.

She also says that parents may even change their ‘favourites’ at times. However, if parents cannot seem to love their children equally, at least, strive to treat them fairly.

Family therapist and dynamic speaker, Stephanie Martson said, “Self-esteem is the real magic wand that can form a child’s future. A child’s self-esteem affects every area of her existence, from friends she chooses, to how well she does academically in school, to what kind of job she gets, to even the person she chooses to marry.”

A Dog’s Loyalty Knows No Bounds

I have grown up with dogs all my life and it’s amazing how ‘human’ they can be. I remember Jack, who used to hide in a corner and start shaking when an argument broke out at home. They always knew when we were angry.

They also knew we were going away when they saw us packing our suitcases in the house and they wagged their tails excitedly at the sound of the car engine when any of us were coming home.

That’s when I realised how in tune they were with our lives and our emotions. It made me wonder if they could be sad too because they were always so happy to see us.

As it turns out, something quite remarkable happened when I was about 12 years old. My mother saw our Great Dane digging up soil (something she had never seen him do before).

She rushed out into the garden to tell him off until she realised he was burying one of our other dogs, which had passed away that morning.

My mother couldn’t believe the scene she had stumbled on. The dogs were all gathered round our Great Dane in a semi-circle to witness the burial of one of their ‘family members’. Incredibly, none of them ate when she put their bowls out at the usual time.

It would be arrogant to think that only humans have the capacity to grieve because all the dogs didn’t touch their food bowls that day.

(Shot of the real-life Hachiko)

The incredible story of Japan’s most faithful dog, Hachiko, is a moving example of how loyal dogs can be. When a movie starring Richard Gere was made about Hachiko, unsurprisingly, I went through several layers of my tissue box when I watched the film.

The story was so simple, yet poignant. Hachiko’s owner was a professor in the University of Tokyo who used to take the train back every evening from work. Hachiko would be promptly waiting at the Shibuya train station to welcome him back, and the pair would walk home together.

No one is sure how Hachiko knew what time it was but he was always waiting at precisely the right time for his owner to return from work.

This routine carried on for about a year until his owner suddenly suffered a cerebral haemorrhage and died at work. His dog, Hachiko was faithfully waiting for him at the train station, not knowing that his owner would never come back.

Hachiko was given away, to be looked after by another family but he kept breaking out and was showing up again and again at his old house. He realised after some time that the owner was no longer living there so he went to wait for him at the train station every evening at that precise time.

Hachiko was seen every evening without fail at the Shibuya train station for almost 10 years, until his death. No one knew where he went in the day but he would always make it to the Shibuya train station by evening, waiting for the same train his owner used to return from work on.

News of this incredible dog spread throughout the nation. The Japanese people were moved by Hachiko’s loyalty and built a bronze statue in honour of him, a year before Hachiko died. Interestingly, Hachiko himself was present during the unveiling ceremony. There was even a Japanese film made about Hachiko in 1987, years before the one made recently starring Gere.

The Shibuya train station is one of the busiest train stations not just in Japan, but the whole world and the legend of Hachiko lives on. His memory is etched forever in our hearts and minds. In fact, the exit he was always seen at is called the “Hachiko Exit”.

It is stories like this including so many of my own real-life ones, growing up with dogs, which have fostered such a deep-rooted respect for them. They give so much and demand so little because they are truly unconditional creatures.

I was telling someone just recently, that it doesn’t matter how many red carpets I’ve walked on because nothing makes me feel more accepted or more of a ‘VIP’ than being greeted by my dogs when I return home. No matter how bad your day has been, they are always there for us, with no judgment and their tails wagging, at the first sight of you.

Learning to Forgive and Let Go

I wonder whether mothers have an unexplainable sixth sense when it comes to their children because I was reading the story of a mother called Aba Gayle who suddenly left her workplace to go home early in the fall of 1980, saying, “I had a funny feeling something was wrong but I didn’t know what it was.”

(Shot of Aba Gayle’s daughter, Catherine)

When she returned home, she received a phone call informing her that her 19-year-old daughter had been stabbed to death.

She wrote about how she almost lost her mind. She became afraid of driving alone because she would often burst into tears at the wheel. She spent eight years of her life living in torment and lusting after revenge.

When the murderer of her daughter was finally put on death row, she thought she would be ‘healed’ but she wasn’t.

(Aba Gayle (right) with Naseem Rakha, the author of The Crying Tree)

She started learning how to meditate and she began reading books from various religions and mythologies. The principles were essentially the same. So many enlightened thinkers throughout the ages have taught about the importance of forgiveness.

When she watched a video of a Jewish Holocaust survivor, she was amazed and inspired by his story. He not only forgave the German people for what had happened to him, but the actual guards who killed every member of his family. She started to hope she could do the same to find peace in her situation.

Approximately 12 years after her daughter’s death, she did something she thought she was not capable of. She wrote a letter to the man who murdered her daughter. She detailed the events leading up to her death. She explained what she was up to and what her dreams were before she was ‘taken’.

She finished her letter by saying she had found it in her heart to forgive him as a “child of God’ and that she would also pray for him.

The act of writing this letter and mailing it was the moment she let go of all that heaviness and rage that was overtaking her life. She finally felt a sense of peace.

In the book Seat of the Soul by Gary Zukav, he explains how forgiveness does not mean condoning another’s hurtful actions but it’s about releasing the negative emotions surrounding these painful events.

The problem of holding on to resentment and anger is that you end up being the ‘victim’ in life.

We lose all our power and energy by allowing those who have hurt us in the past to continue to control how we live our lives in the present. One of Buddha’s quotes was, “You will not be punished for your anger. You will be punished by your anger.”

When you are filled with hatred against someone, you are the one mentally suffering because you are not free from anger.

Personally, I’ve always believed that violence never solves problems, it simply magnifies them. Revenge can never undo damage already done or bring back a life taken from us.

This was what Aba Gayle, an ordinary mother discovered the day she did something extraordinary by mailing that letter to the man who brutally killed her daughter.

She did not require a response nor was she expecting one. She felt healed by the simple act of offering him the gift of her forgiveness.

However, he wrote back to her and in an interview on ABC News, she recalled, “I was so scared to open the letter because everyone on death row must be a monster and what kind of letter would a monster write?”

She was surprised when she read it because there was so much sorrow and remorse for his crime.

She decided to cross a final hurdle in her journey of self-healing, which she later described as “the most frightening day” of her life. She applied for visiting rights to meet him in prison face to face.

She never imagined meeting anyone on death row, much less the very man who stabbed her daughter to death.

This was how far she went to face her fears head on and “let go” of the pain she was carrying for so many years.

It worked. Choosing forgiveness changed her life for the better. Not only did she remove herself from the path of self-destruction and revenge, she channeled her energies into setting up a foundation in memory of her daughter (a non-profit organisation called the Catherine Blount Foundation) where she is dedicated to help others heal through the power of forgiveness.

We all go through pain, hurt and resentment on so many different levels but I will leave you with this vivid quote from author Lewis B Smedes, “Vengeance is having a videotape planted in your soul that cannot be turned off. It plays the painful scene over and over again inside your mind… and each time it plays, you feel the clap of pain again. Forgiving turns off the videotape of pained memory. Forgiving sets you free.”

If you wanted to read the whole story of what this incredible mother went through, please visit www.catherineblountfdn.org

Alcoholism can destroy lives…

I WOKE up with a jolt when my girlfriend called me up wailing on the phone, “Oh my God! I can’t do this anymore!”

She had spent the whole night worried sick about her boyfriend, not realising he had collapsed outside her front door from drinking too much.

By day, he was a totally different person. I found him sharply intelligent, well spoken and a really likable guy.

Once, she heard him crying in the shower and banging his fist against the wall because he was so horrified by the bruises he saw on her arms. Bruises he had inflicted but had no memory of the incident.

She threatened to break up with him many times but what held her back was the remorse he felt from drinking too much.

She held a heart-wrenching belief that he could change.

She didn’t want to believe what she read in the ‘Big Book’ from Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). It states in no uncertain terms that once a person is an alcoholic, they are always an alcoholic, which is why the only “cure” is to go sober.

But, how many alcoholics from the estimated 140 million in the world (according to statistics from the World Health Organisation) have the strength and resolve to go ‘cold turkey’? Sadly, his condition went from bad to worse and she became a frantic partner, in need of professional help herself.

The reality is that we all live among alcoholics. We walk past them on the street and may rub shoulders with them at work but do we even know how debilitating the condition is?

Sustained alcohol abuse actually damages almost every organ in the body, including the central nervous system and the brain.

According to the National Health Service in the United Kingdom, alcohol is also the second biggest risk factor for cancers of the mouth and throat (after smoking). That’s just physical manifestations but what about the families it ruins or the mental anguish and strain it place on everyone around the alcoholic?

If you have ever been connected to a person who’s an alcoholic, you don’t come first in their life. Period. They are slaves to the bottle.

Partners fall into the trap of trying to ‘save them’ but people have to help themselves first, not just because someone else wants them to.

The good news is that alcoholics don’t need to suffer alone. The AA organisation, for one, operates all over the world.

It is a fellowship of men and women from all walks of life who come together to share their experiences and to support each other through their drinking issues.

The only requirement for membership is the common desire to stop drinking.

In Malaysia, it has been around since the late 60s. I recently spoke to a member in Kuala Lumpur who has been sober for 18 years and he has seen so many people helped through these sharing sessions, which are available every day.

“There are so many suffering in silence but they do not have to. We are here to help each other because we have gone through it ourselves. Our doors are always open,” he said.

If you have any fears that you might have a drinking problem, you might want to try answering these 12 questions from AA:

·Have you ever decided to stop drinking for a week or so, but it only lasted for a couple of days?

·Do you wish people would mind their own business about your drinking and stop telling you what to do?

·Have you ever switched from one kind of drink to another in the hope that this would keep you from getting drunk?

·Do you need a drink to get started, or to stop shaking? If so, this is a pretty sure sign that you are not drinking “socially.”

·Do you envy people who can drink without getting into trouble? (As in have you wondered why you can’t take it or leave it like most people?)

·Have you had problems connected with drinking during the past year?

·Has your drinking caused trouble at home?

·Do you ever try to get “extra” drinks at a party because you do not get enough?

·Do you tell yourself you can stop drinking any time you want to, even though you keep getting drunk when you don’t mean to?

·Have you missed days of work or school because of drinking? (How often have you called in sick because you were too hung over?)

·Do you have memory “blackouts”?

·Have you ever felt that your life would be better if you did not drink?

According to AA, if you’ve said “yes” to four or more of these questions, you could already have a drinking issue on your hands.

For enquiries on AA Malaysia, call 017-254 0116 or visit www.aamalaysia.org

Macy Celebrity Sofa Creations

I was a part of 12 celebrities who gathered together to design our very own limited edition MACY sofas for charity. It was really fun!!! We’ve all never done this before. We got to choose what style, shape, colour and fabric we wanted, right down to the sofa legs. The best part about it, is that 100 per cent of the proceeds of these sofas will be going to Yayasan Chow Kit. Check out this video of the design process!

If you’re interested in buying any of the sofas the celebrities designed, head down to Macy at Ikano in June. And if you can’t make it down there this month, they will also be on sale at Macy in Wisma Minlon (opp UPM) in July.

Nobody Wants To Grow Old Alone

Taken from my Star column today, Fri 6th May on M17

Life is unpredictable but one thing’s for sure. We are all going to die someday. Just recently, my insurance agent was asking me about my will and I immediately thought to myself, “But that’s for grown-ups and older people!” But she was right to point out of course, that I was already grown-up and my age was irrelevant because death is something that can happen to anyone, at any time. In fact, whenever someone dies young, we are not even prepared for it. It takes us by surprise because the youth seem invincible.

They are young and agile and light up our silver screens with their million dollar smiles. Years ago, I remember feeling taken aback when I heard of Princess Diana’s demise. Surely, it was not possible. I was struck by that same feeling of disbelief when I heard on the radio in January 2008, “Heath Ledger was found dead in his New York apartment.”

The reason why I’m thinking about all this is because I visited my friend’s grandfather who is almost 100 years old. To be standing in an old folk’s home surrounded by the elderly, was the other side of the coin. Unlike the youth, health is not taken for granted. Having good eyesight, basic mobility to go to the bathroom on your own becomes a thing of pride.

I saw frail bodies, some sleeping in nappies and being fed by carers because they could not feed themselves. Many of them were existing, rather than living. They were staring blankly into space awaiting their inevitable fate. In the living room of the home, there was a semi-circle of wheelchairs in front of the TV set watching pop stars on MTV. On a closer look, they were not really watching the TV, but merely sitting in front of it.

I followed my friend to the corner of the room where “Kung Kung” was sitting. Up until last month, he was living at home with his wife, who the family all call “Po Po”. She said her husband was starting to get dementia (the most common disabling illness associated with old age according to Department of Statistics of Malaysia). He would leave kitchen appliances on, have severe mood swings and talk to himself. In the end, she was so worried for his safety that he had to be moved into an old folk’s home.

At the age of 89, Popo visits her husband at the same time every day though he cannot always recognize her. Despite the inconvenience of daily travel, she always arrives in time for his first meal. The carers pass her the food bowl because she feeds him herself, despite the fact she is almost 90.

I’m not sure if our modern marriages now are built to last the way they did in the old days. Popo was the shining example of a traditional wife who was still struggling to look after her man, despite the trying circumstances. It was a humble reminder of the vows so many starry-eyed young couples pledge to cherish their partners “in sickness and in health.” As we all know, so many marriages don’t even make it to the point of growing old together. In fact, in the Malay Mail recently, it was reported that a Muslim couple gets divorced every 15 minutes in Malaysia!

It’s one thing for people to be fickle about their life partners but what I found really saddening was to see the elderly growing old without any family or loved ones around them. Not everyone there was like ‘Kung Kung’ with a regular stream of visitors.

There was a lady who was sitting on her bed, wide-awake, just looking out the window. I asked her what it was like living in the old folks home and she said, “My husband died many years ago. I don’t want to be home alone. It’s better for me to be here.” When I asked if she had any children, she told me she had five, but they were all too busy to visit their mother and some of them lived overseas so she rarely had any visitors. It must be difficult to be growing old, filled with boredom, and feeling so alone in this world.

My visit to the home was a reminder to not take health for granted. I truly hope my parents will be able to continue to look after themselves, right into old age. Presently, they travel so much and lead such an active life that I can’t imagine them growing old.

However, growing old is a part of life and as time goes by, one’s mobility depends on one’s fitness and health, which is why exercise is so crucial. There’s no point waiting till you cannot move around to start thinking about it. My parents are not keen on exercise but I’m going to try my hardest to get them enrolled into a Tai Chi or Qi Gong class because I want them to stay with me, both physically and mentally for as long as they possibly can.

My “Avatar” Experience

The closest I’ve ever come to my very own “Avatar” experience wasn’t in some distant, far away nation. It was right here in Malaysia, deep in the heart of the Borneo jungle, to shoot a documentary in Kampung Buayan, Sabah. It was so remote that it took 4 hours off road from Kota Kinabalu and 7 hours on foot through gushing rivers and dense jungle.

After walking for three hours, the sounds of the forest were almost hypnotic. I started zoning out and letting go of the city, including my initial fears about this trip. They seemed almost superficial now. I was told I would be living in a bamboo hut with the hill tribes and that I would have to fish for my own food. I was worried about whether I could survive without my usual creature comforts like hot water, access to my twitter account or feather-down pillows.

Yet, there I was trekking through a lost world so untouched that I felt a need to tread quietly and respectfully through it. I marveled at the lush green moss lighting my path like a fluorescent marker. The Borneo rainforest is more than 130 million years old but so many Malaysians I’ve spoken to seem unaware we have the oldest rainforest in the world.

When I started my journey, I thought I was prepared for life in the jungle. I was not. For starters, my local guide said my expensive hiking boots would get waterlogged when crossing deep rivers, “You need to buy the kampung shoe. We all wear it. It’s less than RM10”

After trekking for about three hours, in my lightweight, brand new pair of waterproof “kampung shoes”, a torrential downpour descended upon us. The rain frightened me not because it was relentless but because I heard that leeches love the wet weather. True enough, when I finally arrived at the head villager’s bamboo hut, I let out an ear-piercing scream when I took off my shoes. There were leeches between my toes and another one had crawled up to my knee, under my cargo pants.

The villagers who greeted me, amused by my reaction, welcomed me with warm, dry clothes and promptly ushered me to a secluded spot to have a bath. It was breathtaking and it was where I spent every morning, brushing my teeth and bathing in the icy stream.

I was introduced to an elderly woman from a nearby village, fit as ever, because of the long distances they walk every day. I found out she was almost 80 but the most intriguing thing, was the colour of her hair. It was jet black but she had never stepped foot into a hair salon her entire life. I think it was due to her stress free existence and the clean, fresh air she wakes up to every morning.

When I got a cut on my arm, my local guide, Daniel Doughty from Borneo Colours, introduced the local medicine man to me. Somehow, he knew exactly which plant would help heal my small wound. I was amazed because the cut was almost unnoticeable the next day. For the communities living there from the time of their ancestors, the forest was their pharmacy. Everything they needed was right on their bio-diverse doorstep, or what the locals would call “home”.

So you can imagine how disturbed I was to hear that the State government planned to build a RM2.8 billion dam. According to Malaysia Today, that will drown 12 sq km of land, displace 1,400 Dusun residences and destroy farms, orchards, community halls, clinics, four schools, several churches, ancestral graveyards, suspension bridges, ecotourism sites and sprawling rice fields.

Having lived with the hill tribes and understanding their simple way of life, it was impossible to imagine how they would function or find work in the city. This existence is all they have ever known. As one heartbroken native, Irene, told Wild Asia, “Our lives are here. We have everything that we need. The river is our icebox and the land is our supermarket”

According to a Straits Times Singapore news article, the proposed Kaiduan dam project contradicts the UN Declaration for the Rights of Indigenous Peoples, to which Malaysia is a signatory. In addition, the proposed location has long been recognised as a primary centre for plant diversity and is included in the WWF Global 200 high priority eco regions.

It is my heartfelt wish that the Dusun communities will continue to live on their ancestral land and that the bio-diverse region will continue to flourish and thrive. I left Borneo, moved by the sheer beauty of the forest and her people but they all shared the same plea, “Please don’t sweep our lives away”. If you have any comments you would like to share on the building of the dam, please drop me an email (jojostruys.com@gmail.com) or send me a message on twitter @jojo_struys

Shooting Yuna in London and New York

Guys, as usual I was cracking my head over what topic I wanted to write about next. My “bears harvested for their parts” article was very depressing but I strongly felt that the cruelty bears in captivity endure need all the help and exposure they can get so I wanted to raise awareness. This one’s about Yuna because I just returned from shooting her for “Yuna Inspired”. Here’s the article taken from my Star column today…which ran with the shot of Yuna and me standing back to back but there were so many more fun shots taken on the trip so I’ve included them here. Enjoy!!!

(Yuna tweeting on the streets of London)

WHEN I first saw singing sensation Yuna, the word ‘unexpected’ popped into my head. She was wearing a funky leather jacket, boots and a green tudung!

Don’t get me wrong. She was fully covered, as you would expect anyone wearing a headscarf to be, but she broke the stereotypes of traditionally-clad women we have seen either in the kitchen or holding corporate positions in Malaysia.

She was neither a housewife nor a corporate professional, though she graduated with a law degree from Universiti Teknologi Mara. She could have become a lawyer, but fate had something different in store for Yunalis Zarai, whom fans fondly refer to as Yuna.

If you have not heard of her, let me fill you in. She has become Malaysia’s most influential singer online, with a fan base exceeding 710,000 on Facebook and over 40,000 followers on Twitter. I remember reading one of my friend’s messages on Twitter “I could listen to her voice all day” and that was when curiosity killed the cat.

I decided to look her up on YouTube. I was genuinely taken aback when I heard the opening lines of Rocket. She has this rare purity in her voice and her songs were almost therapeutic. I was thinking to myself, “Wow. She sounds like a cross between Fiona Apple and Norah Jones.”

I was not surprised to hear The Fader music label, based in New York has already spotted Yuna’s raw talent and is planning to launch her album internationally. The Fader magazine, which is part of the Fader group of companies, was the first magazine in the United States to put Eminem on their cover, before the rest of the world started to catch on to who he was. So, these are exciting times for Yuna and the rest of us watching her from the sidelines as she takes her first brave foray into the US market.

As luck would have it, an opportunity came up in Malaysia for my production house, kyanite.tv, to conceptualise a project called Astro Hitz ‘Yuna Inspired’ Powered by DiGi. The idea was simple. Yuna was going to organically build a song from scratch with her fans.

She puts up a verse on her Facebook wall every week with a missing line and everyone is encouraged to send in their lines via Facebook or Twitter. She then handpicks the winners who stand to win cool Canon cameras up for grabs.

At the same time, we are filming never-before-seen footage of Yuna’s life from KL, London to New York, which you can catch on www.yunainspired.com as well as Astro Hitz daily. Incredibly, we even shot Yuna on her MAS flight to London!

(Friends of Jojo and Yuna….Singer/songwriter Shayna and Photographer Nadirah in East Village, NYC)

When I was in her apartment in New York, I heard her manager telling her, “You have a meeting with Russell Simmons. Bring your guitar and don’t be late.”

My stomach did a flip-flop. I was nervous for her because this man was like the Godfather of hip-hop. In fact, USA Today listed Russell Simmons on the top 25 list of most influential people over the last 25 years in the US.

When Yuna met him, it took her a good few seconds to answer one of his questions because she said, “He has this commanding presence. He just controls the conversation.” Well, she must have done something right because the music mogul himself tweeted about her when she left the building saying, “An amazing new singer just came by my office and blessed me with her music.”

If that is not all, Yuna just finished a publicity shoot in New York with a world-class photographer who has shot stars like David Beckham, Diddy, Jennifer Lopez and the late Michael Jackson so I am keeping my fingers crossed that she will make her mark internationally.

(This is Zul Luey. He takes extraordinary shots like the black and white ones you see of Yuna!)

Filming her life here as well as in the US was not just about the glitz and glam. We wanted to capture an accurate representation of who Yuna really is. She has performed in front of royalty but she was more than happy to stand in the cold and eat pizza at her favourite roadside stall in London.

She is incredibly attached to her family and if you read her tweets, you would definitely have seen various versions of “I miss you Mum! Hi Dad! Wish you were here!” In fact, we filmed Yuna going back to her roots in her kampung in Perak, which was such a stark contrast to checking into the elegant Millennium Gloucester Hotel in London or walking down Fifth Avenue in New York.

(Yuna and crew at Times Square)

No matter the setting, she managed to remain Yuna who wears multi-coloured headscraves, loves her friends, adores her family and continues to surprise us with her songs. I hope she doesn’t change.

Jojo Struys is a TV host/producer and twitterer @jojo_struys. She is currently producing/directing Astro Hitz ‘Yuna Inspired’ Powered by DiGi which can be viewed on www.yunainspired.com as well as Astro Hitz Channel 705 every Sunday at 930pm, repeating throughout the week, Friday 645pm and midnight, Sat 12pm and 930pm etc.